Which is the perfect segue into what I want to actually talk about in this post. (It's a bit of wordy one, so turn back now if you cba.) Believe it or not, it's taken me a week to write this. I've been writing and deleting entire posts, unsure of whether I should click the publish button but today I thought I'd pull my socks up and just do it, otherwise I never will.
In two weeks, I'll be starting a new job that I'm very excited about. It's closer to my degree subject than my current job and I couldn't be more relieved that I've been given this opportunity. In the past few months of post-graduation I've been feeling really lost, like a lot of people have, I imagine. I did a journalism degree but even coming out with a First, I didn't want to do journalism anymore... but then I didn't really have a clue of what I wanted to do.
There are two types of people: those who heavily pursue a certain career path and those who will do whatever just to get by for now. I was the latter because the fear of failure stopped me from being the former. But then I took an opportunity and luckily, it paid off, so now I'm being very retrospective about the situation I was in, for fresh graduates, or anyone looking to get into a new career, and it saddens and irks me. 'Grown ups' will tell you what to expect and what you need to do when you get into the real world but no-one can actually prepare you for how you'll actually feel.
For me, it was like being a tiny amoeba in a big pond, let alone a small fish. Everyone is more experienced than me; I have nothing to offer; did I make a big mistake by not choosing to do a Masters? Hard-working people who talked about "the hustle for success" and "if you want, go get it" only made me more scared and slink back into the safety of my duvet. I'm generally a quiet person who happily trundles along in this world without huge ambitions but to be happy and healthy and to have enough money to feed my Zara addiction. And I think the post-graduate expectations that "society", for want of a better word, have built up are incredibly daunting for people like me. My generation are all scrambling to get only a handful of media jobs available and even just the retail jobs are hard to come by, so it can definitely be easily to be left behind. But with how overwhelmed I've felt, I'm glad I didn't succumb to the pressures of what I had to do in order to be successful. And I've realised that there's nothing wrong with being "left behind". There's nothing wrong with being a little bit lazy sometimes and just wanting to enjoy the time I have as a young'en without responbility! I have the rest of my life for that.
I stopped comparing myself to others
Being on a media campus at university meant I was surrounded by people chasing internship after internship (often unpaid). It stressed me out at times and made me think that if I wasn't doing the same, I'd never get a good job. Ultimately, I decided that I'd rather dedicate my time to my studies and myself and surprise, surprise: no big deal!
University isn't the be all and end all
Before and after graduating I dithered a lot over whether to do a Masters degree. I think some people think that it's a sure fire way to have an advantage over the regular degree holders but I can say that's absolutely not guaranteed. Now that I've managed to find a job, I'm so glad I chose not continue further education. Jumping straight into the next stage of life is the best thing I've done because it means I have to move forward, instead of keeping me shelthered wih the safety of education. Plus, I could not be bothered with writing another essay.
I don't have huge ambitions but I didn't want to settle
I've never wanted to do retail so I didn't apply for a single retail job. My childish mindset was that I wanted to feel "grown up" and go for jobs that paid a salary, not a wage. I started to believe in myself that I was worth the salary jobs and it paid off, thankfully.
I wasn't afraid to show my dedication to my blog
I think a blog is absolutely worth putting on a CV if you're proud of it, provided it's updated regularly. It shows that you've learnt skills yourself and that you're passionate about something. Mine certainly gave me plenty to talk about with my interviewers and honestly, I think a blog can deserve as much worth on a CV as an internship somewhere else.
Life is one big fluke
Just like passing my driving test and getting into uni and graduating uni, I got VERY lucky this time. Although I felt very down about not knowing which direction to go in (even considered TEFL to teach in China, just to have a job), the big picture is that I came back from my holiday and within two weeks I'd secured two job interviews and started one of the jobs. This doesn't happen to everyone but then again, trying to gain experience every free waking minute you have doesn't guarantee a cool media job for everyone either. So don't even worry about it. An opportunity is bound to come along eventually. If it takes a while then it takes a while. That doesn't mean life is a fail.
I overcame The Fear!
I very nearly didn't go for my second interview because I had already found a job and I was adamant that I wouldn't get it, so why waste my time? But I had nothing to lose so I went for it and fortune favoured me that day! If I didn't try then I never would have known and I would have missed out on a great opportunity.
I think this post has probably turned into incoherent rambings and I might have contradicted myself but I don't think I'll re-read it, otherwise I'll end up deleting it again. Disclaimer!! - I don't mean to sound braggy that I've found a job, nor entitled because I'm lucky enough to have never needed to work alongside my education, nor high and mighty that I think the way I've done things is better than other people. I just wanted to put my thoughts out there. If you've gotten this far, amazing - I love you - and I'd love to read your thoughts in the comments!